When I was younger,
and hopeful,
I fell madly in love with every girl,
Who was kind enough to talk to me,
And as it went,
Passionate
And innocent,
But never reciprocated.
And after every time,
I went into this perpetual loop of misery,
That somehow ended up as a self-discovery,
Or art of sorts,
So much so,
That I needed to be in that misery,
To function,
To travel,
To discover,
To write,
Most importantly to be happily unhappy.
So, every time I met a woman,
Who was kind enough to love me,
To share her thoughts,
her body
Or happiness with me,
I leafed away,
As easily as the new spring,
As quickly as the summer rain,
After of course a brief period of bloom
As ephemeral as an orgasm;
I leafed away,
From the imminent happiness.
For how could I arrive at that point,
If my happiness was in perpetual pursuit?
How can I be,
If my identity is in being?
How can I stay,
If my destiny is in constant wandering?
So,
I leafed away,
Until I found myself,
Hopelessly and helplessly,
Entangled in the braids of your dismay,
And this time I want to stay,
If you let me,
I swear,
this time I’ll stay.
Our nights
under the starry skies,
You,
drunk in love,
and I,
in alcohol.
When we used to wander
in my rickety car,
after a bad day in life,
listening to Dylan
talk about love,
life, and freedom
You would often find a quiet spot,
mostly in front of a cigarette shop,
and we would park the car,
kill the engine,
roll down the windows,
and listen to the breeze harmonize
with the harmonica.
I never quite understood why
you would suddenly become so quiet,
and wave your fingers in the air,
in the ebb and flow of the melody,
and try to communicate something,
which I was too naive to understand.
I would just look at you,
glistening under a reticent yellow light
escaping somewhere from the darkness
to fall on your fair skin
while you release the white clouds,
from the captivity of your puckered lips,
and wonder
how easily you could conceal,
your inherent grace,
under the messy hair,
profane language
and bad hangovers.
And then you would catch me,
staring at you in awe,
and I would get intimidated,
by the unadulterated love
oozing out of your expectant eyes.
Our nights,
under the skies,
long gone,
You,
intoxicated in love,
and I,
in regret.
“poems that tell stories,
stories about promises,
promises of love,
love that transformed into art,
art that manifested through poems,
poems that do not rhyme”
‘Poems that do not rhyme’ is a collection of poems written in the form of free verses.
Although the individual poems seem unrelated at the first glance but the poems are arranged in such an order that they traverse through the journey of an alcoholic man who accidentally falls in love with a girl who was still in love with her ex-lover.
The poems revolve around his character, his love for her, his alcoholism, his hatred, his lamentations and his regrets for losing her.
Book now available on amazon :
I reclaim myself,
from the remnants of you
that I had kept hidden
(even from my ego)
on the margins of the old books
that we once shared,
and on the pale pages of the forgotten journals
that escaped my heartbroken carnage,
and on the four digits combinations of lockers,
and the passwords,
and the pins codes,
and the signatures,
and all the other little pieces of you,
that I had used to build my world.
I, finally, become myself again,
however incomplete.
We fell apart
as easily as we had met,
you left me
and never looked back
but I could never really let you go.
I cherished you
in the infinite conversations
that I had with you in my head.
I answered everything
you once asked me.
I confessed everything
I never could say to you.
And I planned everything
I would say to you
if you ever came back,
to apologize
or to find closure
or to mock me for my weakness…
I have seen
the stubborn little girl in you,
I have seen
the rebel adolescent in you,
I have seen
the obnoxious selfish lady in you,
so, I know that it would never happen,
but if it did
I don’t know which
half remembered conversation
or poem I would recite for you.
May be I would slander you,
or maybe I would say
that you never broke my heart
but I broke it for you
over and over again
or maybe I would just say
that it was a pleasure
every fucking time…
